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Speaking of milestones (see previous entry).... The speed we need in running around the park has taken a dramatic increase in the past few weeks.
We took the training wheels/stabilizers off Cian's bike and here is a quick sample of the result.
A strange milestone was reached in our house yesterday (Friday). Cian arrived home from school and determined that he was ready for a sleepover at his friends' house - Miles and Carson. As we discussed it, his "closing arguement" was that, "you need some alone time tonight; where there is no one calling in the middle of the night; no one up early in the morning; no one asking "rub my back pleaaassseeee"; just time for yourself".
Wow. Couldn't argue with that one, I tell ya.
And so it was, he called up Jenn (Miles' mother) -- and invited himself over for a sleepover.
From idea to plan in less than 10 minutes.
And while one would then assume that the parents were free for a wild night and a long sleep in, it all ended with Anne asleep on the couch by 10.45 and me getting up at 7AM because, well, I just couldn't sleep.
The house felt kind of empty. Even the dog was confused -- walking into Cian's room this morning only to find an empty bed.
Anne's summary was, "this must be what empty nesters feel. Imagine what it'll be like when he leaves for good in 15 years or so".
Shit, it's no wonder I didn't sleep.
So the last month has seen me going through the de-cubification process. Life without a cube has proved itself to be more worthwhile than I had imagined to be honest. How quickly it all just washes away.
What the hell am I babbling about? At this point if it doesn't ring a bell the rest of this rant may just bore you. Otherwise read on.....
So Jan 12 was my last official day with my name velcroed outside an office cube wall (note: is that really a verb -- "velcroed"??). After ten and a half years of (at times) enjoying and (at times) enduring life at Intel, I finally decided to quit.
It has been a long time coming but finally in early December i got up off my arse and made it official.
I needed a change. new adventures. New aspects. New challenges. You know what I mean (especially now that you have made the commitment to reading this diatribe).
I needed to feel what else life has to offer.
"We stand here confronted by insurmountable opportunities" (thanks Pogo)
I had come to the realization that life has been on auto-pilot for 2 years now and I ran the risk of letting it pass by. The important things in life are the moments that we trip over randomly and the moments we share with others... moments that can make us laugh and cry....moments where we can find inspiration -- whether that be to inspire ourselves or to inspire others.
Increasingly there was no inspiration in my work, yet it was invading so much of my life and taking up so much energy. It was the pull into a deep dark abyss that I knowingly was getting pulled into.
Fortunately I have the support of a wonderful woman and a child who would ask "when are you going to be your own boss, Dad?". And I just pulled the plug.
And god it felt (and continues to feel) so fucking good... Not knowing where it is all headed is a wonderful adventure in and of itself. Stepping out to feel the wind of life blow; just pausing to stop and reflect on where life is going; realizing that there is a whole new world out there is such a relief.
Being aware of the awakening of spring for the first time in years is so refreshing. Seeing life emerge from winter ever so gradually instead of only seeing it once the daffodils have bloomed, feels liberating.
I am awake.
I am aware.
I am alive.
Christ I think I could write a book on the last few months -- and yet I somehow have managed to avoid this blog for three and a half months. You know the way you leave something aside, with the best of intentions, and then you just leave it there, casting guily glances toward it every once in a while....???
Well anyway that is how it has been recently.... And while I have been casting those guilty glances, Christmas passed us by, I quit Intel after ten and a half years there, Cian learned to ride his bike, I set up the framework of my consulting firm (and subsequently got bored by it), Cian got his first stitches after a nasty gash left its mark on his virgin forehead (nothing to do with bike riding by the way), Anne went to Switzerland for 12 days for a family funeral, we have started figuring out schools for Cian this September, we got our annual snowfall here in Portland and (coinciding with the snow) Colum arrived to launch his new book. Oh and our kitchen got (kinda) finished too....
Ah..... Life. We are faced with insurmountable opportunities.
So lots to cover... I'll try to break this out into a couple of different posts -- so I won't spill my guts in one brief post -- I will come back with more.... In the meantime here are some snapshots of a Christmas visit to the beach:
